Saturday, July 19, 2008

Christian without God?

Someone said to me the other day, "I'm a Catholic atheist: love the Church, but don't believe in God. The rituals of the Catholic Church feel like home to me."

Wha-wha-what?!?

How can this be? Then, I realized how close to home this actually is.

My wife is Catholic. We were married in the Catholic Church (thank God or my marriage wouldn't be real and my kids would be bastards!). She is hardly über Catholic, but she is not an atheist either. She feels very safe and at home in the Catholic Church. She doesn't get much out of it spiritually from what I've gathered, but the tradition and rituals give her this comfort.

She does feel the guilt... "Boom boom boom boom ... row ya bastards!" - Eddie Izzard

As a result, we are raising our kids Catholic. This has created a strange problem for me. I have a hard time going to church when I don't believe in God and a divine Jesus. I feel like a hypocrite or dishonest sometimes, even though I do like a good sermon/homily. In spite of this, I do go with them a fair amount.

My kids know I'm not Catholic, but they haven't really questioned me too much yet. I did get asked by my second oldest once after CCD (catechism), "Dad, what do you love most about Jesus?" "Eh ... uh ... I think he's a good role model for how to treat other people. He said some really great things that people 2,000 years later still connect with." I try not to contradict what they're being taught, but I will inject what "some other people think" when I feel it's warranted.

So how can someone feel at home in church as an atheist? I think it's easier for Catholics because there is more of a cultural side, like being Jewish. I've know several Jews that probably fit into a similar mold.

I've considered converting to Catholicism for a consistent front for my kids. My wife has never asked and was quite surprised when I brought this up the first time. I told her, "We have four kids, you'd think they'd make me honorary by now!"

2 comments:

Leah said...

I wonder about what to teach my children about religion, not because I'm concerned about the eternal welfare of their souls, but because I wonder about them missing out on a potentially enriching facet of life. I think religion is make-believe, but it's a make-believe that I like, something akin to experiences I've had doing theatre, actually.

Rob said...

I don't really have a problem with religion, provided it doesn't put a roadblock in front of independent thinking, scientific reasoning, and being open-minded.

I haven't known many non-Christian religious people very well, so most of my experience is with Christians. I have found that non-literalists/fundamentalists can still be the above.

I understand why people like going to church, but it's still a little odd going to me if you don't believe.

I often wonder how many people really believe it.